Everytime I think of you
by PRODIGIOUS TECHIE
Summary: Quistis has nobody left. She still loves Squall but he's got Rinoa. What'll happen? QuallSquinoaSeiftis. Songfic:BritneySpears, Game:FFVIII. Disclaimer: Don't own it.


Everytime I think of you

Prodigious Techie

_Foreword:_

_Hello to all of you readers at (or those visiting my fanfic web site). I'm back, with another short fanfic. I've been meaning to work on this for a year now, but I ended up writing it in one night, in under a couple of hours. Look, I'm not that great of a writer, I know. I have no imagination, which is why I don't even bother to write much. But I'm graduating soon, and there's a lot of stuff I need to get out before I get into college, in which I'll more than likely disappear completely like so many other writers._

_First of all, this story of Quistis Trepe and Squall Leonhart is a bit based on my former relationship that ended ten months ago. Wow…almost a year. When my ex-boyfriend and I first met, it felt like love at first sight. We were Squall and Rinoa at a Cosplay gathering…and we didn't even know there was going to be the other side of the pairing at the party. We never even met till that afternoon. When we became friends, it became more and more like love, and almost a real relationship. I loved him with every fiber of my being. He was my best friend; I was his Quistis and Rinoa. He made me feel like I was on top of the world and that I had everything I ever wanted. I thought I was enough for him._

_All the pretty dreams and anxious waiting came to a standstill in April of 2006._

_My 'Squall' ended up asking me for dating advice. It was supposedly for his friend. I didn't believe it for a minute, but I thought he was going to officially ask me on a date (we had one the month before, I invited him to go hang out in my town with me, and he agreed and had a great time back then). I was wrong, oh so wrong. We hadn't spoken since then, I guess. Lack of communication started to happen after a whirlwhind "relationship," if you could even call it that. 'Squall' found a girlfriend. I guess he found his real Rinoa. I heard they had some hardships, and broke up for a little bit, leaving me some hope. That hope never came through, though. The new Rinoa and Squall are happy together, and here's Quistis, left in the dust._

_I wanted this short story to be great, expressing how I feel, and how Quistis probably felt in her position. I'm sure there are girls who have felt this way in the world, and I hope that you can connect with this story as close to heart as I'm trying to make it._

_The dream has come to an end._

_Prodigious Techie_

My name is Quistis Trepe. You've probably heard of me. If not, well, I'm a former SeeD instructor, instituted at Balamb Garden. By this time, I'm 19 years old, and the third Sorceress War has just passed. My team and I fought Sorceress Ultimecia. I'm pretty sure you've heard of the small group of people that "saved the planet against the evil Sorceress." That was us. Well, my story started way before this all did. I fell in love with the greatest guy ever. His name's Squall Leonhart, leader of our group, and Commander of Balamb Garden. But I knew him since way back when we were kids, at this orphanage on a continent called Centra. That's when it started. We were kids, Selphie, Zell, Seifer, Irvine, Squall and I. Even as a child then, I fell in love with Squall Leonhart. That was his given name, and he wasn't really an orphan either. Word had it that he was dropped off at the orphanage by his dad, who was gonna come back to him someday, but never did. Years later, they reunited. But that's just another story.

I don't remember when we all left the orphanage, but I do know that all us kids left one at a time. Zell got adopted by the Dinchts of Balamb Town. Selphie Tilmitt was sent to Trabia Garden, Irvine Kinneas to Galbadia Garden. Seifer, Squall, and I ended up studying at the same institute, yes you know, Balamb Garden. When I was 15, I became a SeeD. I'm only a year older than Squall, but I was known as the Garden Prodigy. I was ahead of my classes, which set me ahead of the other students, and eventually got me accepted as a SeeD. When I was 17, I became Instructor of Squall and Seifer's class. Unfortunately due to Seifer Almasy failing his exam deliberately, my license to be Instructor Quistis Trepe had been revoked.

Afterwards, I was just part of SeeD. A mercenary, but such a job didn't interest me. I loved teaching. Actually…to tell you the truth, I loved Squall being in my class. Well, some time after Squall, Selphie, and Zell's graduation to become official SeeD, those three were hired by one Rinoa Heartilly to help her supposedly overthrow the corrupt government of Timber and erase the President, Vinzer Deling. They did just that, but one thing led to another, and suddenly we became the famous group that aimed to stop the line of Sorceresses. It started with Edea Kramer. She, actually, was our Matron at the orphanage. She was the woman who raised us, but we found out that she absorbed the power of Sorceress Adel to protect us children from being corrupted. We became known as the Children of Fate. In either way, it couldn't have been changed. Us children were raised by the same woman (sans Rinoa, who grew up with a family in Deling City) and yet though separated, we ended up meeting together again. Well, after the defeat of Edea, the story of Sorceress Adel came to be. Though first, Edea's powers had to be transferred into a willing host. We didn't realize that the host would be Rinoa. Now that was a girl who flirted shamelessly with the ever-icy Squall. But I swore his heart belonged to me.

_Notice me, take my hand_

_Why are we strangers when_

_Our love is strong_

_Why carry on without me?_

Sorry about that. Before I get off topic again, let's go ahead with this story. Rinoa, as a Sorceress, was hypnotized by Adel, to release her. Yeah…we had to beat the crap out of Adel and kill her. But that's not the end of it. The transfer of power went to Ultimecia. Our group had to travel in time to the farthest future just to get to her. Yes we killed her, and the power couldn't dissipate into thin air, so it still resided in Rinoa Heartilly. Well, guess what? When we were traveling back to the present, we were also lost in time. But Rinoa and Squall had a 'special spot.' It was a place where they would meet if they got lost. That was the flower field at the side of the orphanage. Our orphanage. I felt that she had no right to invade my childhood memories, but she did. I didn't like that.

_Everytime I try to fly, I fall_

_Without my wings, I feel so small_

_I guess I need you, baby_

_And everytime I see you in my dreams_

_I see your face, it's haunting me_

_I guess I need you, baby_

You'd probably say that I'm a jealous girl. I don't mean to be. Squall and Rinoa hooked up after our group came home from the future. There was a huge party, and though I was in a crowd, I was alone. Selphie and Irvine hooked up as well, running around the ballroom and filming everyone at the party. I tried to be happy. That couldn't be so, because at one point, I turned around to get some fresh air outside. I didn't. The balcony was already occupied by—you guessed it: Squall and Rinoa, hereafter referred to as "Squinoa." People think it's a pretty popular name to combine the two of them. Frankly, it annoys me and sounds like the name of a fish species. I guess that's what they get for originating in a town that prides itself on smelly fish.

Okay, okay I'm off topic again. Slap me the next time that happens. The basic of it is that they kissed. I saw, unfortunately. But at least I wasn't the only one who did. Selphie filmed it, and I got upset. I didn't want to know what happened but it's obvious to say that Squinoa had finally become an item. Everyone else was happy, and me being myself, I couldn't be. I still loved that unreachable guy, and as much as I wanted to deny them as a couple, I couldn't. I went to bed at night, but they were always sleepless because I was either crying, or thinking too much. Actually it's basically the same thing. You know, crying, and thinking, and wondering what to do next.

_I make believe that you are here_

_It's the only way I see clear_

_What have I done?_

_You seem to move on easy_

Damn, am I selfish or what? I really don't mean to be, but I don't know what else to say. I don't know what else to do. Our group in present day mode, well, here we are. Seifer's a fugitive from Balamb Garden (which pretty much leaves him out as a choice since nobody knows where he is), Squinoa's here, Selphie and Irvine are together, and even Zell's got that pigtail girl. Where does that leave Quistis? _The_ Quistis Trepe that everyone saw as a real woman who had everything together? Well here she is. I'm sick of putting up a façade of tranquility and serene-ness. That's not even a word. I've nothing better to do, so hey, I'll wander around the Garden. Who knows? Maybe I'll end up somewhere else at the end of the day.

_And everytime I try to fly, I fall_

_Without my wings, I feel so small_

_I guess I need you, baby_

_And everytime I see you in my dreams_

_I see your face, you're haunting me_

_I guess I need you, baby_

It's raining outside. Thank Hyne that the Garden was reconstructed back to its original spot on the continent it was on before we had to move. Oh yeah, our Garden got attacked, and we found out that it was constructed to be mobile. I really wanted to get out of here. Did I forget to mention that it's February, and it's a while past Valentine's Day? Well, now you know. You can also imagine all the couples around Balamb Garden. But I found myself walking outside of Garden.

_I may have made it rain_

_Please forgive me_

_My weakness caused you pain_

_And this song's my sorry_

With only a tan trenchcoat on over my battle gear, I had money stuffed in my inner coat pocket, my whip wrapped around my waist. I don't know where I'm going, but I think I need to go away. But where to? All I can think of is Squall. Damn you to Hell, Squall. You broke my heart! Before I thought of going back to Garden to kill Rinoa, I ran, further and further away.

_At night I pray_

_That soon your face will fade away_

Please stay out of my mind, Squall. Should I get my thoughts away in a nightclub? Where do I go from here?

Your smile.

He only smiled for her.

Your dark eyes.

He only looked at her.

Your lips.

He only kissed her.

Your real self.

He only showed it to her.

Your love.

He gave it to _her_ and nobody else.

Did he ever love me, as much as I loved him, for just even one moment? I doubt it. Well, this is the end of my story. I guess you would say I was obsessed with Squall Leonhart. I wanted to plot my revenge against him, too. There were so many ways to torture him, hurt him for what he's done. You'd think that with all my composure, that I was demented. You'd say I was selfish and self-centered.

You're probably right. But I left. I left Garden, left everything. I figured I didn't need my money where I was going. It didn't matter anymore. I know I have to move on. Everyone else is going to have to move on after this.

_And everytime I try to fly, I fall_

_Without my wings, I feel so small_

_I guess I need you, baby_

_And everytime I see you in my dreams_

_I see your face, you're haunting me_

_I guess I need you, baby_

Seifer Almasy was the leader of the Dollet Coast Guard. He was the one who found Quistis' body, pale and seemingly peaceful. She was still beautiful. But he knew her reasons. He knew she loved Squall, but Squall was a heartbreaker, even if the brunette didn't know it himself. He held her, examining her perfect features. How could she ever think that she wasn't good enough for anybody? He was the one who truly loved her. Seifer's Coast Guard team started crowding around him, and he yelled at them to leave him alone; that he'd take care of reporting the body they had just found. After the last of the crew members left for another place on the boat, Seifer broke down. It wasn't difficult to hear him, but none of his team knew that he knew this dead woman. Seifer placed a kiss on Quistis' frozen lips, held her tightly, and ordered his co-captain to sail them back to the Dollet dock as fast as possible. His tears stained Quistis' beautiful face. He wiped them away, hoping she could just wake up and say that she was all right. There was no pulse, and even if he could do CPR, he knew she wasn't going to wake up.

The next morning, Galbadia 5 News reported from Balamb officials that a body had been found in the Balamb-Dollet ocean. One Quistis Trepe was found dead, possibly drowned out by the storm, at 7:00 AM on February 22, 2007 by the Dollet Coast Guard. There was no proof of a homicide, nor any possible reported reason for a suicide. The heart of the matter was that Quistis Trepe was dead. Quistis Trepe, a powerful woman of the SeeD Institution, a great friend, a beautiful Instructor. She was someone who people could usually rely on, and was usually level-headed.

Rinoa Heartilly was the first to turn on the news at 9:00 AM on February 22, 2007. She usually intended to turn the channel to Galbadia 5 by request of Squall, whom she woke up next to, because he watched it every morning.

By 9:30, everybody in Balamb Garden and Balamb City knew what happened. How long did it take for the whole world to find out? Not very long, as Edea and Cid organized a mourning period. People wondered when she left, and why. How did Quistis get swept out to sea? There wasn't anything wrong with her, at least not on the outside. But nobody knew the pain she suffered till the end.


End file.
